5.05.2010

daughter

i have been dreaming of my future child(ren) since i was 17...and in my sleep there has always been the same chubby little boy. sometimes he is an infant and sometimes he is a toddler. once or twice he has been as old as 8 years old. i can't recall a single dream with a girl child...

last night i dreamt i was playing with my daughter. her eyes were like honey!
her hair was the color of mine when i was as young (3?,) but as curly as my Mama's. 
we were playing together on a sunny lawn. she would kiss me somewhere and i would kiss her back on the same spot. i would kiss the wrong place purposefully every once in a while and it would send her into a fit of giggles.

i am a serious dreamer. (in more ways than one)
i dreamt of my grandmother's death a year before cancer took her away. 
i've known of most of the big changes in my life before they happen and every once in a while i dream for the people in my life. 

so i wonder. why a little girl? after so many years of the same little boy...why is my dream-child now a daughter?

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